On Becoming an Adventurer
The Lady Alexis knew that current politics required that the Duke keep his involvement in the Big Changes to Tradition relatively low-key. Thus, to achieve her aim of knighthood, it might be desirable to find someone to go around the Duke, taking the blame of her liege for her ambition. She knew that, around the court, people neither kind nor hostile termed Paris "the Prince's soldier."
Some night after the Raven Lair Raid.
Alexis' duties as a herald have kept her at the castle quite late, so Paris had no trouble hunting her up after her own evening schedule. The student knight nodded politely to the two guards assigned to the lady herald.
[S: ...trying to remember what we said before the noise picked up:]
Paris gave a small bow. "Lady Alexis, I had a very nice time with your gracious family last Sevenday and I must thank you for your magnanimity in wanting to involve them in -- my progress. But -- I couldn't help, that is, forgive me for asking but -- Your parents do not truly want you to become a swordswoman, do they? They don't really want you involved with -- adventurers, do they?"
Lady Alexis regarded Paris for some moments in silence then answered, simply, "No, they don't." Paris returned the look somewhat awkwardly. The lady went on, "Would your parents approve of what you are doing?"
Paris swallowed and glanced away. She looked back and her voice was low and slightly hoarse. "My parents were both dead before I -- changed. There was never any talk about -- my dreams or ambitions -- before the Change. There was no call. There was no thought - that such as I -- could be aught than what I was born. If there had been no Change, I do not think -- I've no way of knowing -- but I do not think anyone in Jouet would have approved -- of my daring to rise above -- all that. But my parents taught me to do what was Right and necessary. And that is what the Change forced on me."
Alexis nodded slowly, looking more than a bit unhappy. "I must apologize. It was cruel of me to ask that, and it was not my intention to cause you pain." She looked out the dark window for a long moment, then continued. "Had there been no Change..." She looked as if she might pound her fist into a nearby piece of furniture, but controlled the impulse after taking a deep breath. "Had there been no Change, much would be different. Or, perhaps I should say, much would be as it was before. The Duke, and his father before him, had already defied tradition by making me their herald. They, and my father, had set me on this path some years ago. The Change added a different bent to it..." She smiled, though there is no humor in her voice. "...and additional impetus, but I had already set myself apart from what was customary, before that damned card."
Paris said softly, "I do not think of the Cards as damned. They are so only if used wrongly, if they become black. My Card opened a dream of hope and honour in the midst of an unthinkably ugly nightmare of death, destruction and depravity. Then Prince William offered to give a reality to that dream. Now I strive to become whatever it is He needs of me; I live to serve the ideals He represents. It was only in choosing ideals that I could be said to have chosen the path I walk; the actuality is that I walk a path chosen for me by my Prince although I cannot clearly see all of its purpose."
"In -- in the time before," Paris' voice is still soft, her eyes clear, "I suppose one could say that I followed a path set apart from tradition as well. When my father died a handful of years ago, I tried to take his place, to run the farm and care for my mother and brother. [This may give Alexis pause as Paris does not look to be any older than Alexis and is, more than likely, younger by a year or two.] Someone had to -- and so I did what I had to." She shrugged. "Rhori says it seems to be my nature to do what has to be done. I -- had not thought of it as choice before. Trying to do a man's job was simply a necessity that Death forced upon me. No one in Jouet spoke against that. At least not in my hearing." She paused a moment. "Though that may give more reason behind the usual comment that Calais should have been the girl and I the boy. I - always thought it because he is handsomer than I...." Paris' voice trailed off thoughtfully. [Paris is, in fact, quite good-looking; her brother is only a point comlier. And, when all decked out and made-up properly she is more than presentable.]
Paris continued. "When the Card chose me and I, it, I had no thought as to whether or not the choice was 'appropriate.' As it would seem you had little choice in your Card either." Paris inclined her head slightly. "But I have come to understand that the Prince has staked a great deal of His own prestige and honour in His attempt to acknowledge that the Card did not choose wrongly. Every mistake I make rebounds not only to my shame but, in that way, to His discredit as well. If I can be shamed and discredited, my life and honour is of little loss compared to how my Prince might be smeared.
Paris glanced at the seat near Alexis' and, gracefully but abruptly, sat down there. She turned towards Alexis, attitude and attention intent upon the herald. "We have spoken before of your desire to adventure. To practise the skills your Card gave you. I have said what I have said in order that you understand that you ask me to further imperil my Prince's reputation by risking a member of his vassel's court, a gentle-born lady, against her parents' wishes. If I am to add that risk to my own possibly-costly mistakes, the reasons I present must be just and well-thought-out. Forgive my bluntness, but the risk to you -- which I have no doubt your courage disdains -- is small in comparison to the possible risk to my Prince. So you must help me work out the reasoning."
Alexis listened intently, nodded and smiled slightly. "The Prince chooses well. Everything you have done, has reflected well on him." She stopped and looked thoughtful for a moment. "But you are very right in what you say, and I would not have you do anything that might reflect badly on the Prince. Either in word, or perception. This is something that I must do myself, I think. I was not given a choice in the card I was given. Nor was I given a choice in accepting it. And had I known the price, I would not have taken it." She looked past Paris at nothing in particular for a moment, sighed and focused again. "As you guessed, I have already spoken with my parents and they are not happy. I will be speaking with them again, and to the Duke. Should I be allowed to take up the sword, I have no illusions of the risk it would entail. But I would rather be given the choice to accept that risk, than be dismissed as a child trying to act on a whim."
"No one has treated me as a child ..." Paris voice faded into a grin as her eyes took on an introspective look. "Well, at least as long as I was not involved in childish things. I," she looked at Alexis with a mixture of amusement and chagrin in her expression, "have had a lot to learn that seems to come naturally to others in this place." Paris nodded. "Speak with your Duke, then, if you needs must, we will speak again. I --" she hesitated, "do not have easy access to my Prince. So it would take some time -- once we have our reasoning in mind -- if we needs must try for -- His influence." For a moment it seemed as though Paris would rise and leave, but she turned back to the lady. "As long as my mind is on things I have yet to learn... forgive me for any seeming rudeness. I merely seek to understand. Tell me, please, what your gracious mother wished to imply with her offer of a second invitation to dine with the -- leMortes? I -- am -- not experienced enough and sometimes see ill where good is intended and vice versa. But I would rather not be gauche enough to accept an invitation where I am not actually wanted. I could tell that -- I at times made your kind parents -- uncomfortable?"
Alexis smiled and stifled a small laugh. "The Murets. They are long time family friends. My mother, I think, has decided she likes you. And that you will be made a knight. The Murets have an unmarried son, you see. They had approached my parents last year about a match with him." Her lightened mood disappeared visibly. "We had all hoped Reynaud would be knighted, so the match was not arranged. I did not know of it until just a few days ago." She shook her head slowly. "I am tainting this with a brush of my own making, I think. My parents had agreed to help aid your cause in court, and now recognize the value of that on its own merit. I do them a disservice by presuming a hidden meaning in their offer. The Murets are good people, and will also be happy to know you. If you are still here next seven-day, please, accept the invitation to dinner. The discomfort you saw in my parents was not because of you. Rather, it was the reminder of what I had told them far too recently of my own intentions. I hope you enjoyed the dinner, despite it."
[M: Actually, what Pat said is that the Duke would talk to her father, and wouldn't go against his wishes. Her father had been unhappy with the idea, but hadn't said no to it. Given what's happened and what's been said, Alexis isn't going to ask Paris to intercede with the Prince.]
[S: Um. If you'd like Sheryl's take on it... given that Paris and the Prince are already up to their necks in it, it might be far, far, far more politic to safe-guard your duke and try to get the prince to intercede. If the Duke basically tells his Baron de la Ponte that they ought to let Alexis go adventuring, the Duke will start being tarred with the same brush being used for Paris and the Prince. "He didn't even try to stand up for his own people against the will of that tradition-mocker princeling -- who isn't going to be anything anyway, being only 3rd in line." "Can you believe he would actually _encourage_ a lady's father to throw her into the hands of peasant ruffians. Who knows how often they had their way with her? What if he tells _you_ to send _your_ daughter off? Do you even think it's ok to send her into his court?" Etc..
If it can all be blamed on the Prince, then the Duke still commands the respect of his barons and can remain a moderating voice between the oldtimers and the wave of new represented by the Prince (and himself, but he's trying to keep that low-key).
If the Duke has to take responsibility for this decision (and he will in the minds of other nobles -- even if it seems to be your father acquiescing), then you have taken away a bit of his current strength in maintaining apparent status quo while helping the prince as much as possible. Besides, if the prince makes the request, he basically puts Alexis under the care of "his people": Paris and Rhori -- which takes care of the potential problem of Alexis outranking the Party and thus having to be the leader in a situation she hasn't been prepared for. Just my take on it. Obviously I think it's worthwhile to construct our 'justifiable reasoning.' But it really is your decision.]
I've given you some suggestions for how the politics of the situation affect the duke. Paris would definitely listen to Alexis making those arguments. (I gave them to you as Sheryl 'cause Paris doesn't know as much about Palace Politics as Sheryl guesses and as Alexis is likely to know.)
All of those arguments occur to me off the top of my head. I'm sure others have occurred to you. Use any you like, just phrase them as Alexis would.
Alexis: "Thank you for your offer to ask the Prince for his help in this, but I can not accept. I would not put his name at greater risk, and I think there is a way that will not stain either the Prince, or the Duke. You are right that my parents are unhappy with what I would like to do, but do understand it is their desire to keep me from harm, rather than a feeling it is wrong. Setting aside parental concern, my question to you is, do you want me to join you?"
Paris looked uncomfortable and partially rose in a bow. "I beg your pardon, my lady." She remained standing. "If my Prince's name is at risk now it is because he has chosen to champion me. My every action and word is a risk to him, I have reason to fear. Every rumour that can be generated about me is an additional risk. How can I, in honour, set aside your parents' concern? How can I guess what that would do to Rumour? How can I, in honour, say 'I want' or 'I don't want' to what a lord decides? I can say, 'I think this is wrong' or 'I think this is right', but -- my 'want' cannot be part of the question. To forestall Rumour, my 'want' must have nothing to do with it. If you are to -- travel upon the Prince's business -- then His name is involved, willhe, nillhe, for the task you speak of joining is one assigned by Him. If I have any say in the matter, it is to weigh the risk of your safety vs. the benefit to this task. And if He asks me for my say, I should have better reason than now I see. If He does not ask, then He has given the task into your hands and I must do as He and Justice require." She paused, then glanced at Alexis with a trace of pleading. Her voice was very quiet. "I cannot encourage you to come without His permission -- or without enough reason that honest people could see that His permission could be given."
Alexis sighed, collected her thoughts for a moment, started to speak, then stopped with a look of total exasperation. "Paris, nothing I have said has come out as I intended. My intent has not been to argue with you. Let me put it as plainly as possible. While my parents do not wish me to come to harm, they understand that I must follow the path that has been set before me. My father has made my safety when out of the city my own responsibility, and has arranged for armor and weapons for my use. Should I leave, word will be put about that I am leaving the city for a time in order to come to terms with recent events. If the assumption is not made swiftly enough that I have gone to stay with one of my sisters, then that will be put about, as well. When I am in the city, I will continue as I have been, escorted by my father's guard. They will not accompany me out of the city. When you have succeeded in becoming a knight, and of that I have no doubt, I will ask my Duke to put forth my candidacy so that I may be knighted when I have skill enough. These past weeks, I have looked into both the spiders and the mountains to the exclusion of all else. There is much I do not have the time or means to tell you about them. And I can not help but think the addition of another who is competent with a sword would be a benefit to your group. I hope that we can help each other, both with this task the Prince has given you, and with the goals we share."
Paris spoke slowly, quietly, with much hesitation, almost to herself. "I -- have walked into traps before. I may not recognize even now, traps that I have triggered in this place. This -- could be one. Word given out and assumptions allowed -- may be turned again by Truth -- into Rumour that could destroy both you and I in this place. And destroy my Prince in so doing. But the trap is ten times worse if you are innocent of it; if -- you believe -- what you say. Is it a trap?" Paris paused, the question very obviously to herself rather than to Alexis. Her stance which had emphasized the difference between seated lord and standing peasant had subtly changed. Her hand had moved to the hilt of her ever-present sword. Paris seemed to be passing judgment on -- Paris. "Yet -- if it is not a trap -- should I turn away -- from a chance -- at friendship? Just because it could be turned into a trap? I -- have -- so few -- to whom I can -- talk. And you -- would give up your nobility born -- to walk the path I walk -- towards nobility earned. Who better -- to have as friend?" For a moment Paris seemed very far away. Then her eyes met Alexis'. "It is a risk," and Alexis could hear a multitude of levels of risk in Paris' tone, "but it is a valiant risk. I have asked for aid before. I will not now turn it away. I will pray that for once I do not err." [S: Sorry, Pat, but, from Paris' point of view this has at least as much Bad Rumour potential as simply turning herself over to the Ravens. She's _trying_ to see it from a good side too -- but, frankly, the only way not to chase Alexis away is to let the 'want' override the potential for spectacularly ugly error. Which has not heretofore been a trait of Paris'. ]
Alexis met her gaze squarely. "I would gladly be your friend. Everything we do is risk, to some degree. In this, there is risk to both of us. But, so far as I can see, there is no trap being laid. I welcome your company, both here and where ever it may take us." She gently reached out a hand to touch Paris'. "You are too hard on yourself, you know. But if you will accept it, I will help however I can."
"If you do not at least see the potential for a trap, then you are far more innocent of the evil that Rumour can do than I am." Paris shivered a little, caught in recollection. "I hope you remain so. But," Paris managed a half smile, "you will find -- if you have not already -- that my comrades from Jouet consider me poor company, being inclined to thoughts and worries over things they think I should ignore. And I doubt that they would agree that I am too hard on myself, given that each has felt at times that I have made poor decisions in disagreeing with his or her wants. And they may be right." Paris gave a small sigh followed by a genuine, albeit self-deprecating, smile directed at Alexis. "Still, how _my_ mind works should not trouble you, my lady. What would you have of me now? How may I help you?"
Alexis: "For me to see the potential for a trap, I, my father, or my Duke would need be party to it. I will agree that without knowledge of any of us, it could be possible. But I know my own heart, and could not conceive of my father or the Duke setting such an entrapment for either of us.
Paris actually (!) interrupted. "Your pardon, my lady. Now it is I who has not said clearly what I meant. I will not believe that you, your father or the Duke is party to the trap I can foresee -- albeit I can imagine how you all could be innocent and it still be a deliberate trap." She shook her head and her tone had a distinctly apologetic note. "I can no longer deny that some things that seem fair are truly not, but I do not wish to go around suspecting everyone so. I still hope that such are merely mistaken and not evil in truth. No, there is no deliberate trap. Believe me; I do not accuse you." Paris met the other's eyes squarely. "What could happen is that the truth that you have joined my comrades in adventuring would be learned in court somehow. If so, then there would be no stopping wicked rumours, for a tiny bit of deceit makes rumours that would normally be brushed off immensely more believable. I know this .. and am very uncomfortable with dissembling, having done too much myself."
Trying to lighten the other girl's mood, Alexis returned to her earlier train of thought,` 1 "As for your being poor company, with that I must disagree. Though, I suspect I have seen you in situations which your friends from Jouet have not." She grinned and almost laughed. "And what of Ewen? Did your day at the vineyards go well?"
"Lord Ewen?" Paris shifted self-consciously, flushing slightly. "I -- I think it went well. There -- are -- things -- I need still to -- work out. But he and his mother -- and their people -- were most kind, most -- I had a pleasant day -- learned a lot." Paris stuttered to an end.
With a little smile, Alexis, continued: "As for help, what I need is knowledge of what to bring with me. Until now, my travel was with the Duke or my father when they set out on official business. I know what sword I use best, my father is arranging for armor and a horse, but what else is needed? What might your group need that I can supply?"
Paris looked the other girl over. Thoughtfully, "If you have not had much experience traveling -- and fighting -- in armor, I must advise you to take yourself, your horse and your armor to someplace where you will not be remarked upon -- and practise. Practise riding in armor. And practise dismounting, prepared to fight -- if you have no experience fighting on horseback. We -- will have less protection on this trip in somewise, I fear, than we have since acquiring our Cards. Thus, if we are not prepared to defend, we must be prepared to fight. Only Rhori and I, of our Party, are actually skilled at fighting from horseback, so I anticipate that we will do so only in utmost necessity. But you should know for yourself whether you will be one who can fight so or must be defended so."
"We tend to travel light and we will travel hard; we have not much time. I know how much time we are allowed and will instruct Mia to that point. She tends to cook for us, so she will be the one to consult on how much foodstuffs we will take -- given the limitations I put upon her." Paris smiled. "The classes in logistics have practical benefit, you see. If there are messages the Duke wants relayed to the elves, it is possible we could take such -- but only if time permits. You yourself may know more than I what is needed if we travel to the mountains you spoke of. Or at least the tales you've read may know. A blanket and warm cloak at least. Gear for caring for your horse. I carry implements for mapping and note-taking, but another set, in water-proof, could be good. You are freer than I in this palace so ... Any knowledge you might be able to glean from the Duke's padre concerning the treatment of spider venom might be good. He used the sample we'd collected before I had time to analyze it -- and I do not think I will get another chance before it might be needed. The ability to see at night and feel no fear are powers none of us have, so it is fruitless for me to mention them. But," she grins, "I can always wish!"
[GM: Paris sounds different in these exchanges (not the one Ewen one, that is pure Paris). Not quite sure I can put my finger on it, but it seems a little more...stilted? Is that intentional?]
[S: Yes. As soon as Alexis said that she didn't need the Prince's permission, Paris remembered that Alexis is a lord and she is not -- howsoever much she has been taught to think as one. She is now trying to think both styles, because she still does not know how Alexis' plan can _not_ bring trouble. And nothing Alexis can say will take away the _fact_ that she is a lady-born. [OK. Yes, maybe Pat just won't let anyone find out that Alexis has 'hooked' up with the most controversial bunch of adventurers around ... but there's no way for Paris to know that, given how much trouble people have gone to to make a lady of _her_.] [And I am sorry, Pat, but Alexis' nobility _will_ make a difference. It's worthless if it does not.]Alexis will deserve her share of whatever reward/cards the Prince or Duke choose to hand out to adventurers. Is she really not going to claim it?
And who has the authority to make sure that Anton doesn't slip and mention Alexis in his reports; and he's almost always the one who 'tells the tale' when we go back to court. Silverlocke could stop his tongue once -- but I don't see him 'minding' either Paris or Alexis if they enjoin him to silence. _He_ won't see it as as big a risk as going against Silverlocke's will. It was hard enough for Paris to let people assume she was a boy; it's harder yet to allow a purposeful untruth by "set about". I see this as a real can of worms. I am trying hard to keep a reign on Paris .. but it forces me out of character to do so.
A couple of days before the battle at the Raven base, in the library at the Duke's palace.
Alexis looked up from the old books at the gentle cough. "Lex," her father whispered, "can we go talk for a moment?" In a couple of moments they were in a small room off the library, just the two of them. She sat on one of the chairs at the small table, while her father looked out the small window to the little patch of sky that was visible, hands clasped behind him. "I spoke with the Duke," he finally said. "And, as he suggested, then with Avignon." Baron Avignon was the Town Baron for the section of town that included the adventurer's section. Her father turned to her. "Duke Evan is thinking of changing Avignon's title to Master of Adventurers. He was...a wealth of information about them."
He moved over to the table and pulled out a chair. He sat there, leaning slightly onto his elbows on the table, eyes fixed on her. She'd seen this stance time and time again, when he sat down to negotiate; it was a little disconcerting to be fixed by his black eyes across the table. "There are a number of women swords among the adventurers. Some from the far East, some from here. Without exception, they've lost family. They go and fight as well as the men." He paused for a moment. "About a third of the expeditions that set out don't come back, although that's been dropping as there are more experienced people leading them. Your friend Paris and her group have been more successful than the rest, by most measures. They keep coming back." He studied her face closely. "I don't expect this to scare you, I just want you to know what Avignon told me."
He still didn't break his gaze from hers. "As for what Duke Evan told me." He shook his head slightly. "It seems hard to believe, but about a quarter of our nobles think that the Change is just a minor inconvenience and will go away if we all just refuse to accept it. These Orders are important, somehow, to what is going on. So, to support his Order, and to try to bring home how different things are, Prince William is trying to make Paris a Lady Knight. The quarter of the nobles I spoke of are trying to prevent that, some of them even hiring assassins to kill her. In order to succeed, Paris and her friends not only have to stay alive, but they have to accomplish things that the nation needs. So they have to take on even bigger dangers than they have so far."
"Finally," he continued, "there is the matter of my responsibility. I'm responsible for you, your upbringing, your safety. But if you travel with them, well, it doesn't make much sense to send guards with you if you are going to take up the way of the sword, does it? Paris has no legal rank as of yet, of course. The only one of them who does is the simpleton, as a man-at-arms for Baron Ruby." His face lost its mask and became soft, for just a moment. "Alexis, we love you. Disowning you is not an option for us, we won't do that." [Side note: one way to free Alexis from her responsibilities would be for him to disown her.] His face tightened up again to the negotiator of deals she had seen before. "So, now, I want to know what you have in mind. Bottom line, what is it you want to do? What do you need? Spell out the deal precisely."
[GM: Here is one way I thought things might work out: you get a leave of absence from the Duke on the herald job (already won). You convince your father to let you go be an adventurer for a while; basically, you tell him you want him to let you be responsible for your own safety and virtue. He'd settle on maintaining appearances, requiring you to use one of his guards when you visit the palace or any of the other nobles, but letting it go when you leave town or move in with the others. So, when you're back in town, you go back to "normal," but when you are out of town you are just another adventurer. He would hook you up with the armorer he used for himself to get you armor made, in "boys style" like Paris uses.
Gaining a patent of arms--becoming Sir Alexis--will require passing the same tests the boys do: demonstrating lance, sword & shield, etc. You don't have to win the tournament, just do as well as the minimum combat value. And it will happen after Paris gets her knighthood, because I've already gone too far down that story line.]
"Alexis" copyright 1999 S.Knowles & M.Haldman. The contents of this site are copyright 2004 Sheryl A. Knowles unless otherwise specified. All rights reserved.