From the Journal of Jannisett
Day 290, Thurs., Neon Pig System.
While we were waiting in space for Art to finish, I found Banker alone on the bridge. I had a question that had been bothering me ever since we talked with James Grey. Not the big stuff about being a murderer or making Jinan unhappy or how oddly James Grey makes me feel. I do not know who I can talk to about those things. But Banker has always been steady and he knows a lot about being human; he is older than everyone else, after all. And he's read all the adventure and romance discs, so he must know a lot. He has probably read other discs I know nothing about.
So I asked. "What would you call a place you came from that is not home?"
Banker stopped for a moment, then seemed to find his reference point on a disc. "Oh, you mean what your Grey was talking about?"
I did not correct him about which was "my" Grey. It did not matter; my Grey is dead. "Yes. I looked up the word 'home' in the dictionary and part of it seems to mean the place I came from and part of it does not. I have no 'ties of affection' there."
He nodded. "And you're thinking that the Ranch place is more like home?"
I nodded back. "Yes. But what should I call the other place? We talk about it so I must call it something."
Banker said, "Most native people call their planet their word for soil, dirt. What's your native word for that?"
I: "My language is this, common; except that I know words that you and the others do not use."
Banker: "Did those words come from your people or the Owners?"
I: "I do not know. I do not think there is a difference in the languages."
Banker: "Well, if you can find out what language that is, you can pick a word that means 'earth'. Or make something up. It won't matter to us."
So I asked. "What is there about us that still makes you uncomfortable?"
Art: "You move so quickly. All of you. It seems impossible that you should need to be so fast."
I: "Was there no danger back when the universe was young? Were there no threats that you and other creatures had to avoid speedily?"
Art: "There were dangers. But no such threats to the individual."
I did not understand and spent some time thinking about a way to understand that I did not listen well to Art's continued speech on the subject of understanding humans. It made a long explanation that I eventually realized meant that it had not gathered enough information on any aspect of the human race with which to make a judgement. I had not meant to make it think that broadly; I know so little about all the other human worlds that Banker talks about, myself. So I stopped Art. "I did not mean the human race, Art. I meant the 'society of the Sorcerer'. What puzzles you the most about us?"
Art: "You do not work together. You do not work as a team. You highly prize your extreme individuality."
I nodded. I think I understand that Art's people - being able to communicate with each other with their minds, to share like it said it could do momentarily with Shepherd's unconsciousness - probably do co-ordinate their activities very well. "The people on the Sorcerer have not been trained to work together. We have not had that training." I know very well how important training is!
Art seemed to understand.
I asked my other question: "What do you call 'home,' the planet you came from? That your people came from?"
Art startled me with, "I did not come from a planet. Every planet I have been to is my home."
I was, as I am so often, confused by Art's answer. "I thought everyone came from a place."
Art: "When my race came to this universe, our purpose was to raise other life forms to sentience. We traveled in ships to many places to do just that. Our purpose, our lives necessitated travel."
I: "So you lived on ships?"
Art: "'Lived'... living is a complicated concept. For generations we traveled from world to word.... Of course, there was a world we originated on, but it was left behind when we hopped to this universe."
I did not understand all of what it told me and so I have not recorded all of the conversation, but another thought occurred to me. "When you speak of your race - you have said all of its members are your brothers and sisters. Yet you talk of generations of your race. If I have understood what the others on the Sorcerer have said - and I looked up the word 'generations' - it means that there are mothers and fathers and children and children's children. And each layer of those is a generation. How can you speak of generations?"
Art: "It is a matter of time. We live so much longer than your kind do. After enough time has passed there is not enough difference between what one generation has learned and what the next generation has learned so they all smooth out together."
I: "Is that like my people? If Jinan and I had stayed in the place-that-is-not-home, when she became eleven, there would have been no difference between us in height and weight and strength; we would have appeared to be alike. And in another few years, if she had continued her katas, there would have been no difference in our skills. We would have been considered of the same value."
Art: "Consider your katas. Consider how your skills improve. There was a great deal of difference between what you could do as a child and what you could do at 20. Would there be as large a difference if you continue to practise your katas until you are 40?"
I: "I am 20 and I was considered to be as good as an asim could get when I left the place-that-is-not-home. There was no one better. Thus there has been no one like me who practised until age 40. I do not know how much better I could get. There is no example. I do not know if one can be better when one is the best." Then it struck me, "Oh! That is what you mean! There is no difference." Then I modulated my voice back down. "How very strange to be able to imagine something that has never been. This is wonderful."
I: "Jamie, I have talked to Banker and he suggested that I learn what language it is that the words -- like asim, malik, tabib, etc. -- that I use for which the rest of you have taught me 'common' words -- guard, owner, doctor, etc.. I've been trying to use the common words too. But Banker says that knowing whatever language the other words come from -- and he does not believe that it is common -- would help me find a better name for where I came from." Then I took a deep breath; I am never sure when I will make Jamie impatient with me. "You know alien languages. Can you help me find out what human language has those words? Please?"
[Waiting for Marian's response.]
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